Does he still love me?

Ladylike Help 8

"Is it my fault?"

You say no, of course not, but this is a subconscious fear. If your husband was a famous actor and wore makeup to look good in the colour supplements, would that be down to the way you behave? Wouldn't other women be turned on by him, seeing him wearing makeup and strange clothes in another context? And what right has anyone to judge you for someone else's behaviour?

"I've asked him to stop. Surely he would if he loved me?"

He'd probably do anything to avoid distressing you. Either he feels guilty for having to hide it from you before, or because society disapproves. There would be no advantage for him in making matters worse. He may well try to stop, but no, the simple truth is that you can no more stop him dressing in the long run, than stop the rain. However, it is worth noting that he is making up for lost time. Once he has the freedom to dress whenever he wants, he will actually soon not need to do so as often.

"Is he in love with his image more than me?"

No. We girlies are always trying to look right. We just don't spend so long on it, because we've had more practice! And it is for ourselves we do it, not men. We have pride and pleasure in looking good, feeling good, and why not. It gives us peace, pleasure, and above all confidence too. He is doing the same - he may be vain, but it will actually enhance his loyalty to you, as he admires women so much.

"There's a lot more to being a woman than the clothes!"

True, but you can make it work for you by recognising the benefits of his finer side. If he has a fetish about maid's uniforms, (which incidentally is touching on sub/dom more than crossdressing), let him do more housework while he wears it. Make it into a game and dress up as well. If he is more delicate, decorative and graceful than other men (or wants to be), that is a positive thing. Better than "hard" and more "manly", which can mean the weakness of being more violent, childish, drunk, insensitive, bigamous, etc. You can be proud your man has the mental discipline to try sometimes to be the best (i.e. female!) And you can borrow his clothes.

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